Before I accepted my job offer in Malaysia 4 years ago, I needed to weigh the benefits that I will be getting in working overseas. Career, financial and social aspects. For a typical Filipino, working abroad would mean better pay, better life, well, “better opportunities” to put up in simple words. But these are just the ideal situation. It may be true for some while for others, they may have experienced the opposite- that life abroad is not that easy. We’ve heard and read stories about Overseas Filipino Workers being killed, sexually harassed, underpaid with poor living condition and getting hooked and being involved with illegal drugs.

What were my considerations back then? For my case, by accepting the offer, I can get a higher pay (that’s number one), this would mean that I can continue to support the education of my brothers and sisters: I will also be able to settle some outstanding payables; I get to continue with the similar functions that I was previously doing in my former company, so there will be no major adjustments on this part; I get to bring my wife with me (we got a bonus when she got a job offer days before flying to KL).

So what were the cons of leaving the country? I will miss my family, friends, the people that I work with and most of all the way of life in the Philippines. If you would notice, the list was just few and it made it obvious that I am leaning towards getting the job offer. To be honest, yes, excitement was my initial reaction when I learned that I passed the interview. After days of thinking about it, I said yes and accepted the offer.

When we landed in KL on March of 2008, I already started to miss home. I even said that I will just finish a year of my 2-year contract with AIG. Aside from missing home, there was a culture shock – the food, the people and the way of life. Everything seems to me that we have exchanged some good aspects of our lives into something that we could never learn to embrace. We were out from our comfort zones.

Keeping strong and focused with the main purpose of why we are working overseas has helped us to hold on and tried to cope with the everyday life in KL. Also, with the help of friends that we’ve built throughout the 4 years of our stay has made us feel at home. We have our CFC family that keeps our spiritual life burning, Malaysian friends who keep us company and explain things that we need to know about the food, places and people of Malaysia, I have a weekend badminton group, we have “auntie doby” who gives us a warm greetings whenever we bring some comforters for laundry (doby). As for our jobs, Michelle is already comfortable with IBM. I am also satisfied with Atos – the 3rd company that I have been connected to since we flew to Malaysia.

Yes, everything went well in our case. But I must say it’s not perfect for we have encountered challenges along the way. Up to now we are still dealing with some. I guess it’s already part of our lives. You get some happiness and you get frustrated at times. Well, just enough to make one’s life balanced, it will only make a difference on how each one of us deals with the situation.

We may have proven that we were wrong when we thought that we cannot survive the life in KL, but there are still times that I would suddenly want to be ported instantly in the Philippines. Times that I will start to analyse and compare the trade-offs . Occasions that will make me question random things that are happening around me. Probably this is triggered whenever I am at my lowest point, whenever I am frustrated, bored or idle. But the negative trade-offs are just few, just that, it strikes at random chances.

Below are some of the trade-offs with respect to living in Kuala Lumpur:
People. I have to be honest that I feel bad at times whenever I cannot comprehend the language that the people around me are using. Although I fully understand that it is easier for them to express the topic that they are discussing in their native tongue. I just wish I can understand it, at least for me to be able to share some good stories as well. Sometimes, with the help of some friends, they would try to translate the topic for me and that is very much appreciated.

Food. There are occasions that we will just suddenly crave for a Chickenjoy and Yum Burger of Jollibee; Chowking’s Halo-Halo; or a Max Fried Chicken! The list is just too long to enumerate all the homegrown foods that we missed. Being here in KL for more than four years, we’ve already learned to enjoy few of the local foods, be it Chinese, Malay or Indian dishes (Banana Leaf is the best so far that I have tried), but of course, there are still some that we cannot take as it is too spicy maybe or it’s just plain not pleasing to our senses.

Transportation. The good thing about the roads of Malaysia is that they are wider than on what we have in the Philippines. Although traffic jam is also a big problem for everyone – if jeepneys and buses are taking much of the space on the roads of Manila, it is the volume of the private cars that are occupying the hi-ways of KL. The ease of getting a car loan as they have local car manufacturers and getting it with low monthly amortization has made the roads congested during rush hours. Buses in KL are just the same with Manila in terms of schedule but I think most of the buses in KL are newer as compared on what we have (but you can still see, old types of buses). Train System in KL is far better than the few train lines of Manila along Taft, Aurora Blvd and EDSA. What about Petrol? Yes they are cheaper here.

Sports and Outdoor Activities. World Badminton Championship, Malaysian Open (Tennis), Running Marathons and Concerts are easily accessible. Traveling within Malaysia is also not a problem as your Malaysian Ringgit can go from Mamak foods to a good restaurant.

Housing. The space that we are renting is bigger than where we used to stay in Makati. It’s just a bit expensive but the comfort and accessibility has compensated the amount that we pay monthly. Except for that one incident that somebody broke inside our condo unit. Overall, we’re fine with it.

Compensation and Tax. We are just getting enough. “Enough” that we don’t need to swipe the plastic card to buy the things that we need (also the things that we want). Well, let’s say, higher by few percentage from the pay that I used to receive. When I was working in the Philippines, I was also earning “enough” (I thought), it could have been really enough if the taxes are lower or at least we can see where the money is going, say use it to subsidize the commodities or fund more scholarships or invest more in agriculture/ rice research to regain the title of being one of the major rice exporter in Asia (honestly, I am not sure if it is still possible, sorry for doubting). Tax rates in Malaysia ranges from 0% to 26%. Mine falls somewhere between that range.

There are a lot of aspects that can still be analysed, compared and contrast. It is just clear to us at the moment that even though we are getting some “Trade-offs”, we are happy on where we are that we don’t need to make the list longer. Aside from the work that we have in KL, being surrounded with friends has made KL a home away from home.

*** This is supposed to be an entry to mark our fourth year in KL last March 22, 2012. I was just occupied during that time that I have no time to sit and finish this entry.

We’re having a baby soon, it is just time for me to learn how to drive. It would be more convenient to move around KL when you own a car. Same with Manila, you just have to bear with the heavy traffic jam during peak hours. In Malaysia, cars can easily be loaned as they have local car manufacturers – Proton and Perodua. Cheaper cars and longer payment period (5, 7 or even 9 years).

Last Sunday, my “L” License or Learner’s License was already released. It means that I can already start the 2nd part of my driving lessons – the practical driving. I have already completed the 6-hour lecture, exam that covers the Malaysian Road Signs and Traffic Rules, 4-hour maintenance class where main parts of the car were introduced.

Since It’s a holiday in Malaysia, I took the advantage to schedule my practical driving class. Yesteday was my day 1, right away, my instructor asked me to go out from the compound and do an actual “on the road driving”. Well, that was after getting the basics of the gears (yes, manual cars are used for the class), pedals and steering wheel. There were few unstable moments but overall, I believe I did a pretty good job (that’s the spirit!)

Perodua Kancil Car used for the Driving Class

I enrolled at Master Driving School in Endah Parade, Sri Petaling. What they do is they send their students to another driving school that facilitates the lectures, exams and practical driving. For my case, I had the 1st part in Safety Driving Centre, Petaling Jaya and Metro Driving Academy, Subang for the actual driving. Technically, the school where I paid my fees only acts as an agent. It may be a little bit higher than enrolling directly to the driving institution but since my area is far from these schools and since transportation is provided, it’s convenient. Also, they are very efficient in arranging the schedule (well, 7 out of 10 for I didn’t get an English speaking instructor in my driving class today, anyway, I can let go of it) and processing the license.

Below are the rates and contact details of Master Driving School:

P – RM 1,488 (Inclusive of “L” & “P” License + Unlimited retake of JPJ Exam)
N- RM 880 + 120 (“L” License) + 180 (“P” License)

Sharmila – +6017-3063977
Mr. Lum – +6012- 2056843

Master Driving School, 4th Floor, Endah Parade,
Sri Petaling, 57000, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

Two weeks ago, we went to meet our Doctor again at Gleneagles Hospital in Ampang. Michelle and our Baby had their second full scan. It’s different from the normal scan as it will check every part of the baby. Bone structure, heart beat, size of the skull, arms, legs, and body organs. The actual length of the baby was also measured and it was proportionate to her age – 20 weeks. This scan also confirmed that we will be having a beautiful Baby Girl! Prior to this scan, during the 18th week of our Baby, Dr. Mathews gave our New Year’s Gift as he promised. He revealed with 95% assurance that we will be having a Baby Girl. The checkup went well and everything was normal.

At this stage of pregnancy, the Doctor advised Michelle to eat a full meal with fruits, veggies, meat, fish, egg and milk. The multivitamins and calcium supplement will also be continuously taken. Eating appetite is also getting back to normal although an urge to vomit particularly when brushing her teeth is still being experienced.

Maria Therese @ 20 Weeks

As of this writing, our little kickboxer is already on her 22nd week. Based from Baby Center dot com, “At 11 inches (the length of a spaghetti squash) and almost 1 pound, your baby is starting to look like a miniature newborn. Her lips, eyelids, and eyebrows are becoming more distinct, and she’s even developing tiny tooth buds beneath her gums. Her eyes have formed, but his irises (the colored part of the eye) still lack pigment. “

My friend, buddy, thanks for all the wonderful memories.
For the crazy serve and cross court drop shots in the badminton court.
For all the fun and laughters.
For every sensible stories you have shared over our beer sessions after a Sunday game.
For every greetings whenever there’s an occasion to celebrate.
For being thoughtful.
For making us feel at home in Malaysia.

Until now, I can clearly remember our last conversation after the game. It was warm. You were saying that you will meet my Dad next time here in KL. That there’s a lot of time, we can even have a picture taken together only to realize that it’s too late and we will never have the chance…

He would always tease me that when the time comes that he will meet my Dad, he will make sure to bully me and make it hard for me in the court in front of my Dad. He is just about the age of my Dad – to be exact, he is 4 years younger than my Dad.

May you rest in peace my friend. We will miss your presence in the court. Until the next badminton game buddy.

Bala, a friend whom I met in the Endah Villa Court (Our Condominium) when I joined the weekend badminton group 4 years ago. He died of heart attack at the age of 46.

Somebody broke into the house. Yes you read it right, somebody broke in and took some valuables from our place here in KL. While my parents, youngest sister and I were on vacation in Singapore and Michelle is in the office in KL (yes, she was in KL while we were in Singapore, please don’t emphasize that I left her in KL, alone). On December 28, after Michelle came home from the office at 7:30pm, the main door was still locked as usual but upon getting into the house, she noticed that all the doors of the 3 rooms were open. We normally close all the doors before we leave the house. So she walked in, inspect the doors and everything seems to be normal until she noticed that my office laptop was missing. She immediately called and informed me about the incident. We were on Day 2 of our 3-day holiday but we need to cut our trip short to attend to this matter and to ensure that Michelle and our Baby are fine. We immediately took the 9:00pm bus from Singapore and we reached KL at around 1:30am.

The sign
A week before the incident, from the kitchen, my dad noticed 2 guys who were giving an eye to the railings in our laundry area that is connected to the hall way. It was very obvious that they are trying to check and observe the railings as they stopped upon reaching our laundry area. My dad was hiding behind the door making him unnoticeable. The next day, my mom and youngest sister heard our doorbell rang twice, they just ignored it as I have mentioned that we are not expecting anything (visitor, letter, package or anyone) that day. Also, they are not familiar in KL so they applied the basics of “don’t talk to strangers”. The night I reached home, my dad mentioned what he saw and asked me if robbery ever happened in our condominium. I answered yes (yeah, I’ve heard few cases from the guards) and I was not even alarmed by his story. He did a follow up by describing that the 2 guys were in school uniform, so I confirmed that these are just residents of the condo, I even gave him the confidence by saying that people here are nice (we’ve been renting the place for almost 4 years).

The valuables
1. My 5 year old Fossil watch – it is the other pair of Michelle’s Fossil watch (I decided to wear my Swatch watch during the holiday).
2. Michelle’s Swatch watch – it is the other pair of my Swatch watch (Michelle chose to wear the Fossil watch that day).
3. Michelle’s wedding and engagement ring – her fingers are getting bigger than before because of her pregnancy.
4. My Dell office laptop and laptop bag – good thing nothing is confidential saved in the laptop.
5. My 1 TB external hard disk that contains all the collection of our pictures, movies, mp3s and documents. Files are dated from 2006 to present.
6. HTC Touch 3G – My old phone that is resting in our table awaiting to be transported to Philippines and be given to my Brother Kenneth.
7. 1 set of house keys – they used the main door to escape.
8. 3 Small Nokia phones owned by my Parents and youngest Sister

The suspect
2 short guys with fair complexion. I didn’t bother to review the CCTV recordings for that day since our condo only have CCTVs on the main gate and side doors of the compound, nothing is installed in the lobby and elevators. Why do I have the pictures of the suspect in my mind? When I reported the incident to the Condominium Management, I learned that 2 weeks before our case, 2 attempted robbery in the lower units were intercepted by the guards but the managed to sped away, a car is waiting outside the compound. Although they can recognize the faces of the thieves.

So why the Management didn’t announce the incident so that residents will get reminded? I tried to argue but after a while, I stopped and realized that it will not help to resolve my case. They are just too lousy to answer my queries.

Help and Support
Our heartfelt thanks goes to the people who immediately responded and gave help and support to Michelle during my absence. To our CFC Family – Sis Grace & Bro Jojo, Sis Plebie & Bro Allen for staying with Michelle and for the company while she was making the Police Report. To Moong Fei for offering a hand and guiding us on the necessary things to be done to support the incident such as Police Report; what to expect in the police station and; advice to inform the management of the condominium. To Bert and JM, who helped us to secure the tickets of the earliest bus from SG to KL. To Ditse and Jen for comforting Michelle over the phone while waiting for some friends to reach our place. I am always thankful that we are surrounded by friends.

Lesson Learned
Don’t be too comfortable. Someone out there is waiting to take chance especially during these tough times that people are financially challenged.

Lock it. Invest in a good padlock and place it on every possible entry points.

Don’t ignore Warnings. Warnings exist to alert one on any impending danger.

What’s next?
Initially, we were planning to move to a new place. I actually browsed the internet and contacted some agents for available condominiums also in the same area where we are currently staying, but after few weeks and also with the advice of some friends, I realized that it is not that easy to move all our things to a new place especially that Michelle is pregnant. I myself is getting tired by just thinking on how we will bring down the sofa set, mattress and appliances from our unit. Yes we own almost everything as we got the place unfurnished last time. So we will still be staying in the same condo unit.

As to leaving Malaysia and looking for an opportunity, say in Singapore? It’s not in the plan. My wife and I are still satisfied with the work and life that we have here in Kuala Lumpur. It’s just really our luck that a random stranger broke into the house, nowhere is safe nowadays.

But despite of what happened, we are still thankful that no one was hurt in the incident.

This is a very late year-end post but since 2011 have been a memorable year for me, my wife and my family, it is just right to count these blessings.

First quarter of 2011, I received my confirmation as a regular employee of Atos.   I was very happy when I received the news (though I already anticipated it) as I am really enjoying my job.  More so with the people I am working with, I am happy on where I am now.   Aside from the good news from my employment, on February, I managed to settle all my credit card loans and at the same time, my brother Bryan whom I mainly support, have completed his BS Computer Science degree from the Adamson University, he is now working.  Step by step we are getting closer to achieving the “Financial Freedom”.  It may be hard, challenging and a long journey but we are not giving up.

April, we travelled to a place where I never thought that would be fun and enjoyable.  Bangkok, Thailand at the beginning seems to be just a normal “City” for me, probably what was set on my mind were just the beautiful and popular beaches of Thailand such as Krabi, Phi Phi and Phuket.  But upon landing to Bangkok, we already felt the warmth of the people that made us more excited to pass the Immigration queue.  We have experienced the politeness of Thai people as well as their rich culture, tried the authentic Tomyam Soup, visited the floating market and witnessed the ruins of Ayutthaya.  Overall, it was fun and we will definitely fly back to Thailand.    During the second quarter, we have also fulfilled our commitment as members of the Couples for Christ(CFC), we actively participated in our initiative to bring in more members to the group by sharing our time and giving our personal insights to the new members.

The highlight of 2011 was in the 3^rd quarter.  We found out that Michelle, my wife was pregnant.  Finally, after years of avoiding the questions on when are we planning to have a baby, we have something concrete to share now.  Our baby is now 17 weeks old and next week we are set to know the sex of our baby.  Another bonus on this quarter was when I received the confirmation of my membership as an IT Professional. As to what organization? This will be announced later. Sorry for that.

Finally, December, my parents together with my youngest sister flew to Kuala Lumpur for a month of vacation.  It has been in our plan to get our family visit the place where we are working and living.   We visited the tourist spots that they used to see on the photos (a little bit of drama on that) and they have really enjoyed it. I also brought them to Singapore where they are excited to see the Marina Bay Sands, Merlion, Universal Studios or just simply the city of Singapore.

So these are the good news of 2011.  But I must say, we have experienced humps along the way but we were able to overcome and resolve it.  If there is something major, it happened towards the end of 2011, one thing that we were not expecting, I myself couldn’t believe that it happened.  Let’s talk about it on the next entry.

On a global scale, I also have to mention the news that shocked the whole world.  Who can forget the killer earthquake and tsunami in Japan; the wave of protests in the Middle East;  the war in Libya; the riot in London; the unending hunger in Africa and the recent flash flood caused by typhoon Sendong that killed thousands in the Southern Philippines.  It may be a good year for me but it has been a tough year for many.

What we can do now is to learn from the lessons from the trials and disappointments of the past year and at the same time savor the beautiful things that 2011 has brought to our lives and be thankful that we are still in this world to experience the hope that the New Year brings.

We are very positive that it is going to be a better year for all of us. 

Cheers to 2012!!!

It is a regular afternoon in the workplace, I’m done with my tasks and so I played a Christmas song from my iPod, closed my eyes and reflected on each line and followed the flow of music. After few minutes, my heart began beating so fast that it wanted to cry. In an instant, I want to be “home”. I want to experience the lights, carols, food and warmth of Christmas in the Philippines. I miss the atmosphere of Christmas.

"There's a rainbow always after the rain..."

Well, good thing I managed to divert these thoughts to something positive, the reality that we’re expecting a baby soon is more than enough to be happy . Also, the moment I stepped out from the building, I saw a rainbow painted over Petronas Twin Towers, even nature has its own way of reminding us to enjoy the present life that we have regardless of where we are or whom we are with.

Christmas songs never fail to make us feel the lightness and atmosphere of Joy whenever we hear them.  For people who are away from home, it may bring good old memories and the longing of being with the family and friends during this season.

Since the “ber” month has begun,  in the Philippines, it is considered as the official start of Christmas Season.  Houses are starting to be decorated with lights and lanterns.  Christmas Carols are starting to surround every place.  Although some had already felt the festivity of the season, it was only yesterday when we realized that Christmas is coming, we got reminded by the Christmas Decors and Christmas Songs that are continuously playing in the background while we were in the mall.  Yes, we have it in Kuala Lumpur.

It’s 47 Days to go before Christmas and my wife and I are looking forward for this day and we will be very happy to celebrate it even we are away from home (my parents will be flying over to KL).  We have been blessed with stable job,  good health, supportive families and friends and not to mention the BIG bonus – our baby.

There’s a lot of reasons to be happy and to be thankful for.  As long as we give love and we acknowledge every blessing that we receive, there is no reason to just let the occasion pass.

Last week, Michelle and I had an appointment with Dr. Alex Mathews – our Doctor in Gleneagles Medical Centre (along Jalan Ampang, Kuala Lumpur).  It’s our second time to meet Dr. Mathews.  Just a little bit of background, we knew about Dr. Mathews through the recommendations of friends here in Kuala Lumpur.  So far, we are satisfied on how the staff and Dr. Mathews are handling my wife’s pregnancy.

Upon reaching the clinic, the secretary took Michelle’s blood pressure and weight for monitoring, this will be a routine until our baby is ready to go out from his/her temporary “cradle”.   Based from babycenter.com, an 8-week baby is about a size of a “kidney bean”.   This means that our baby is a lot more visible as compared to the first time we did a consultation – he was just a size of a “sesame seed” (5 weeks) during that time. Yes, our little baby is growing that fast! (Keep it up baby!)

The moment Dr. Mathews started the ultrasound, we immediately saw the tiny heart of our baby that is moving so fast and sounded like a horse running on a race track.  We were both stunned by this confirmation that we are really having a healthy baby.

Actually, 2 days prior to the scheduled checkup, Michelle had some tiny blood spots with some cramps felt on her lower abdomen.  We read some online forums and called nanay (my mother) to ask about it, according to them, it was just normal.  They just suggested to take a rest.  We mentioned it to Dr. Mathews and he suggested that next time it will happen again (hopefully not), be sure to see him for consultation.  But he assured that as of that last scan, everything is normal and we have nothing to worry about.  He just prescribed “Duphaston” for Michelle to take in the next 4 weeks (twice a day), just in-time for the completion of her first trimester.  Other than that, everything is fine, folic acid should still be continuously taken, any food can be eaten (but avoid papaya and pineapple, there’s no scientific proof that explains these fruits can cause miscarriage, nothing to lose anyway, so we’ll just try to avoid it as of now)  and will be back after 3 weeks for the NT Scan (Nuchal Translucency), our baby will be 11 weeks old by then.

During this period – at 8 weeks,  frequent vomiting was experienced and choosing the food to eat has been very difficult. Food odors, some perfumes, food appearances started to become odd and undesirable.  Unexplained body temperature and condition were experienced.

Also, we are starting to spread the seed to our family and friends, we will eventually announce the good news to everyone after the first trimester.

Here’s our baby’s 1st public and stolen shot @ 8 weeks.

Having a baby has always been included on the random questions that our friends and family ask whenever we meet. My mother-in-law particularly, would always remind us about this matter. During the first 2 years of our marriage – year 2009, we would normally say, “It’s not yet on the plan, we’ll just enjoy the moment together” or “we don’t have the budget yet”. We decided to have one on the 3rd year but we had quickly decided to defer it “again” to the following year.

The 1st half of 2011 has swiftly passed without talking about our plans of having a little one. Not that we are not talking about it. Not that we totally don’t want. Let’s just put it this way, we spend longer conversation in planning for the next holiday on choosing which place or whether I will buy a new TV or new phone, a blackberry or an i-Phone and computing our budget – yes, some material things. I must admit that we didn’t have that much focus until we got reminded by a Priest whom we met during the CLP of our CFC Group in Ampang.  With his voice that as if he was giving a sermon, he shared and reiterated that the main purpose of marriage is to build a family.  I don’t know, but after hearing his thoughts on having a baby and raising a child, I just can’t think of anything to say. My reaction was very unusual that I cannot even throw a joke.  Probably a part of me was not totally on his side or we felt that we were just reminded to go on with the plan this time. In another occasion, when we attended the Christening of Baby Ethan, one of my Godson, Tin and Rom were teasing us that she conceived a baby after she held a baby. We just smiled, accepted the idea and open the possibilities of having one soon.

After the “reminder” (yes, we took it as a reminder that we should go with the plan), after hearing constant reminders from our family and friends and since we know that we are ready – we thought that it’s just time to spread the seed of awesomeness. HAHAHA!  If we were trying to avoid the topic last time, now, we can’t even wait for few weeks to know the result. Our plans has drifted and we are now determined to have a baby.

So the exciting and yes, challenging part came – “The Conception”. We grabbed the calendar and started counting the exact date that is most likely my wife can get pregnant. We also consulted the www.babycenter.com to validate the dates, well, just to make sure. [The rest of the story has been censored and instead charged to history. The couple deferred to share this part of the story. HAHAHA!] All I remember was, one Tuesday evening while I was watching the TV, while I am comfortably seated in the sofa and just trying to relax, Michelle suddenly approached me (while she was crying and I was shaking) for the good news. It is indeed true that surprises come in the time and circumstances that you least expected.

To make the long story short, family and friends, I am happy to announce that one of my soldiers managed to meet the queen. My wife is now 7 weeks pregnant, as of this writing. We are having a baby soon and we are more than ready.

It always amazes me to see and experience the miracle of life. Lord, thank you for the Gift of Life.  We promise to treasure, nurture and take care of the precious Gift that you have entrusted to us.

Live simply. Laugh often. Love deeply.

Life’s too short to miss the JOY of having a BABY.